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Joke of the Day

"I don't see why people say, ""God, send me a sign"". Why not ask the Head of Amazon's shipping department?"

"Telling people to ban same sex marriage cuz of your religion is like telling the supermarket to stop selling junk food cuz you're on a diet."

"I asked my French friend if he watched superbowl... ...he said bowling is not so big in Europe."

"Mickey: ""Minnie, I'm leaving you."" Minnie: ""What!? Are you fucking crazy!?"" Mickey: ""No, I'm fucking Daisy"""

"Does Bill Nye always wear a bowtie? Seriously though?"

"Two prime numbers stayed married for life. They couldn't be divided"

"So I just flashed my hard drive. Though why showing my computer my schlong is meant to speed it up I'll never know."

"What's it called when two strains of a disease are identical? plague-arism"

"If you love something,, let it go..... That's EXACTLY what I've done with my body...."

"What be a Pirates favorite letter? Ye all must be willin' to guess Arrrr. But ye be wrong! It be the Sea! Yearha har har har"