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Joke of the Day

"Einstein walks into a bar The bartender says ""Run, everyone! It's a zombie!"""

"My Wife was dead and rotting for a week... ..and i thought she was just having her periods."

"An Idiot boy held his breath for as long as he could. after about two minutes the boy fainted."

"Seeing your ex with someone uglier than you. Awesome."

"Question: If a King runs a Kingdom...& an Emperor runs an Empire... Who runs a country?"

"My idea of responsibility is plugging my phone in at mid-day"

"How can you avoid falling hair? Get out of the way."

"I asked my wife why she never tells me when she has an orgasm... She said ""I don't like ringing you whilst you're at work."""

"What do you call a women who cant draw? Trace"

"[several months ago] BEYONCE: Kim Kardashian might be having a 3RD baby JAY-Z: How many we got BEYONCE: One JAY-Z: Not a problem"