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Joke of the Day

"My friend's wife asked him, if she died tomorrow, when would he start sleeping with other women? He said, ""about three years ago."""

"Me: No, you hang up first Pizza Hut: *click*"

"On the 5th day of Christmas? Christmas is ONE day, Carol. Convert to Judaism if you need a longer holiday."

"What does a gay horse eat? Dick."

"If Lebron's so much better than Jordan then explain to me why Bugs Bunny has never once asked for his help in a game. Cant argue with facts."

"If someone tells you they don't like some particular word, do not torment them with it. To do so is totally moist."

"I had a friend who used to draw on her eyebrows. One day, she accidentally drew them to high. When I told her, she looked surprised."

"Did you hear about the guy that had mountains for legs? He also had a Pyrenees!"

"2017 New Years Resolution First step: write down the resolu"

"Why did the army's craftsman enact a ""Don't Ask, Don't Tell"" Policy? He didn't want any glaze in the military"