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Joke of the Day

"If a woman puts me in the friend zone I immediately borrow money from her and never pay it back because that's what friends do."

"How to teach a cat how to bark? Pour some gasoline on it and WOOF!"

"I have a friend named ""Chris Hoffman"" I asked him to name his son Jack."

"Why did Suzie fall down the stairs? I pushed her"

"""It's 3am and everyone is asleep. Must run into random rooms as fast as I can and jump on everything"" - cats"

"What did the Muslim Zoophiliac say when he found out his friend was a beekeeper? ""Dicks out for Haram Bee"""

"Thanks for explaining the word ""many"" to me. It means a lot"

"Hate when the cop is like, ""Sir, have you been petting kittens?"" and I say, ""I petted a few..."" as I open the car door and kittens spill out"

"What is close to stupidity? Mexico and Canada"

"How do you circumcise a guy in Alabama? You kick her sister in the chin!"