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Joke of the Day

"When a farmer fucks a sheep, do you know why he does so at the edge of a cliff? So the sheep will push back."

"A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall down a cliff... bahhh dum hisss"

"What is a oreo? 2 gang members smashing a white boys face."

"I wanted to get a second dog to keep my dog company. I asked my dog if he wanted me to bring him a male dog or a female dog. He replied... ""Bitch, please""."

"The person who creates Taco Bell's menu must be the biggest pothead of all time."

"Why doesn't Mr.Sodium like to spend time with Mr.H20? Because they always get in to heated arguments."

"Is this subreddit a vacuum? Because it sure does suck."

"Today I'm 45. But with the wind chill I feel like 32."

"[on a date with a teacher] Me: your eyes are beautiful Her: yours too Me:*leans in, whispers* can i kiss you Her: i don't know CAN YOU"

"I like to sit on my hand AFTER i jerk off... ..makes me feel like someone else is making me a sandwich."