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Joke of the Day

"Finding a girlfriend is a lot like fishing... There are plenty of fish in the sea, but it's just you holding your rod until you catch one."

"Whenever someone says ""I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart"", all I hear is ""I know where you can buy drugs"""

"Honey I Shrunk The Kids And Then I Shrunk The Lawnmower And They Are Riding It Around My Head And Giving Me A Haircut It Is Awesome"

"Light travels faster than sound This is why some people appear bright until they speak."

"A good way to break up with a girl is to leave her a trail of rose petals starting from her front door to North Korea."

"Who's the first Irishman to come outside every Spring? Patty O'Furniture"

"You drunkenly fall into one bathtub with your pants around your ankles, breaking the curtain rod and all of a sudden, everyone is a critic"

"What Does Donald Trump Say as an acknowledgment during a discussion of a clever point made at one's expense? Toupee' my friend...Toupee'"

"What do you call? What do you call 'nuts on a chest'? chestnuts. What do you call 'nuts on a wall'? walnuts. What do you call 'nuts on a chin'? .... A dick in your mouth."

"What is the worst part about being told you have Alzheimer's? It never happens just once."