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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a Roman with a hair in his teeth? Gladiator."
Next Joke
"Nothing is better than studying That's why i do nothing."
"What is the proper way to parallel park? Park somewhere else."
"No matter how far you push the envelope it will still be stationery (I know how to spell stationary)"
"I was just minding my own, listening to some Led Zeppelin, and this girl asked if it was Nickelback and now there's so much blood everywhere"
"Fitness coach: have you been exercising & doing push-ups? *Flashback to me running after the ice cream man & buying all the push-ups* ""yes"""
"What kind of marijuana do cows smoke? moo-dicinal"
"*slaps the cup out of the barista's hand* ""No. I want Asriel, the guy with the man-bun, to make my latte. He has a better energy"""
"wife: [walks in door] so whats the big news? -the baby walked! wife: OMG where is he? -i sent him to the store for an ice cream cake"
"Science teacher: What happened when electricity was first discovered? Fred: Someone got a nasty shock."