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Joke of the Day

"I got invited to my first HS party... ten years too late, fuck you all i'm not going to the reunion, get bent."

"How many animals can you fit in a condom? A cock and a couples of hares! Source: I was told this in a bar tonight and felt the need to share it!"

"The Americans are using a new type of rocket that constantly updates its Facebook status until it reaches its target. It's an attention-seeking missile."

"If State Farm were such a good neighbor they'd come over and pick up all the dog shit in my yard."

"Islam is.. ..a religion of peace"

"If you ever get cold... Just stand in a corner. They're usually around 90 degrees!"

"Short, but good nonetheless A midget philanthropist"

"Q: Why did the blonde keep ice cubes in the freezer? A: So she could keep the refrigerator cold."

"A duck walks up to a lemonade stand... and he says quack, quack."

" Why did the snowman smile? Because the snowblower is coming."