220716
Joke of the Day
"How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same, but the dishes start piling up."
Next Joke
"Your Facebook posts are like your children. Some go on to become successful and others make you look stupid."
"asked the universe for literally nothing & received a commercial featuring conjoined twins riding a segway"
"Little Miss Muppet sad on a crumpet... And said ""What the Hell! Who fucking put this here?!"""
"Jim Henson's first job was operating The Godfather logo."
"You think you're not capable of violence, but then a bird sings at 6AM and you start researching surface-to-air missiles."
"What did the blonde do when she discovered that most accidents happen within a mile from home? She moved."
"What's the difference between light and hard? I can sleep with a light on."
"It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs... ...they always take things literally"
"What's long and black? The unemployed line."