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Joke of the Day

"okay ready? What if ancient egyptians put cats on everything because they totally saw the future and they knew what the internet was about"

"How many catholics does it take to change a lightbulb? CHANGE?!"

"My legal team is advising me to get jiggy with it."

"So an Alzheimer's patient was telling a joke... Clarence, is that you?"

"The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same ones she can't stand years later."

"What did the depressed, illiterate pepperoni slice say when asked where he was with his life? Well it pizza heck out of me."

"Saw a guy in the gym, ahead of me on the Lat pulldown machine, wearing a David Luiz T-Shirt Needless to say, I got past him."

"Pick up line - works everytime! ""Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"""

"Why did god give women legs? Have you ever seen the trail a snail leaves?"

"What's the difference between hitler and a gay man. A 45 degree angle."