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Joke of the Day

"What does a subatomic duck say? Quark."

"bae is acting so cute and imaginary tonight"

"It's now politically correct to award kids trophies for last place. On a related note, 'trophy wife' has become rather ambiguous."

"What's worse than a talking parrot joke? The Holocaust."

"You call them ""cuss words""... I call them ""sentence enhancers""."

"What's better than getting a gold medal at the paralympics? Having legs."

"The impossibility of accepting the offer of a quick drink without first pretending to check your watch"

"My wife calls herself a trophy wife. I told her that's because I won the participation award."

"Linguistic studies have shown results about drivers of east asian cars... It is proven that a large number of Hyundai owners have an accent."

"Why didn't Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyer's heart? Because even Cupid can't hit a target that small."