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Joke of the Day

"My doctor said he needed a stool sample from me. The timing was perfect. I was about to go to Ikea anyway"

"Goth people wear black to reflect the color of their souls... Except ginger goths. They go naked."

"What did one wall say to the other? Meet me in the corner!"

"Why did the girl who worked for the telephone company sing all the time? Because she was an operetta (operator)."

"What should you do if you're cold? Stand in the corner, because it's 90 degrees."

"What do you call a movie about artificial orange juice? Pulp Fiction"

"Roses are red, violets are blue.... does this rag smell like chloroform to you? ,"

"Why can't Obama dance? Cause he has two leftist feet."

"If you told me in 1995 that you had to use an mp3 player to copy programs to a telephone in the future, I'd assume you had brain damage"

"Wizard of Oz is the ultimate chick flick. Two women trying to kill each other over shoes. Brilliant, really."