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Joke of the Day
"What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a dog have in common? A wet nose."
Next Joke
"[on the way to the hospital] GF: ""let me get this straight. You thoug-"" Me: I thought that the mouse trap would detect that I am not a mouse"
"What do ghosts dress up as for Halloween? As John Cena because you can't see them."
"Went to Hollister but nothing fit, plus got lost in there for a week. Came out 30lbs lighter, so went back in to buy a shirt. Well played."
"My childhood has prepared me for a lot more bear-related pic-a-nic-basket thefts than I'm currently experiencing."
"What do you call a fish poop born out of wedlock? A bass-turd"
"Does advertisement work? Just did."
"I eat my pizza with a knife and fork because I am from a big family, and you need weapons to protect your food at all times"
"In the very first line of the song, Pitbull claims he works very hard. He then rhymes ""Kodak"" with ""Kodak."""
"Girlfriend said ""I think I'm pregnant, I'm two weeks late.. ..April fools!"""