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Joke of the Day

"What is the worst about a being black AND Jewish? Sitting in the back of the oven. Sorry if this is considered extremely racist mods, please remove if you consider it to be!"

"Some women are born to make history.... I prefer the ones who get deleted from mine."

"I took my kids' screens away so we could spend some quality time together and it turns out they are really terrible to be around"

"What's big but small? A midget's ego."

"All I do all day is roll massive joints and deal with huge quantities of dope. Being a pipe inspector sucks."

"Do you know why I stopped playing Uno with my Mexican friends? They steal all the green cards."

"Turns out the most difficult stain to remove from bed linens is actually shame."

"The other hole. My buddy asked me the other day if whenever my wife and I were getting freaky if I ever tried having sex with her other ""hole"". I replied ""Hell No!"",.......... She might get pregnant."

"Told my dog I was feeding him only natural, holistic food. Not sure he could hear me over slurping of water from toilet."

"What's the difference between a blonde and a computer? You only have to punch information into a computer once. "