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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend and I had a threeso last night... It's like a threesome but it didn't include me."
Next Joke
"How did the math teacher solve her constipation problem? She worked it out with a pencil."
"Why did the smoothie get assassinated? He got mixed up with a few bad apples."
"I was pregnant in High School BEFORE it became popular...."
"My little girl will never have daddy issues. But her future boyfriends will."
"Made my mom the most beautiful Mother's Day card out of my psychiatrist bills."
"I had to take my son's dirty diaper off today. I don't know why I was wearing it in the first place."
"Tried to catch fog yesterday... Mist."
"New career ambition: have an office and big chair that I can slowly turn Bond villain-esquely around in to greet my enemies."
"There are 2 kinds of people in this world; 1. People who like math A. People who hate math 3. People who really don't understand math"