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Joke of the Day

"So tell me, what do you think of the rectum as a whole?"

"A 13 yr old just told me I was cool for an old person. I almost slapped her then she said ""you're like 23, right? I bought her ice cream."

"What did sushi A say to sushi B? Wassa B."

"A small box of strawberries If there was some play on words that could turn a small box of strawberries into a punnet would be quite funny"

"Good news, you survived the horrific car crash. Sadly we couldn't find the other guy's arms but we managed to reattach all four of yours"

"What is the difference betwen a blonde and a Lamborghini? You don't let your friends borrow your Lamborghini."

"Attractive. Brainy. Romantic. Faithful. Makes good food. Gives great head. -- Online dating profile of a male praying mantis."

"I've gone from agony to ecstasy in this last week. Hopefully, by the end of this month... ...I'll be done reading this dictionary."

"What did the depressed, illiterate pepperoni slice say when asked where he was with his life? Well it pizza heck out of me."

"Q: What's the difference between a wife and a mistress? A: About fifty pounds."