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Joke of the Day

"A guy gets pulled over for speeding The cops walks up to the guy's car window and says ""Son, I've been here just a waitin' for you all day."" The guy replies ""Well, I got here as fast as I could""."

Next Joke
 
"Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf."
"You have some up dog on your shoe!! So I was in class one day and my friend turned to me and said, ""You have some up dog on your shoe"" ""What's up dog"" was my response. ""Not much bro, how about you!!!"""
"Time I spend listening to music 54 seconds. Time I spend untangling headphones 17 minutes"
"What did they call the documentary about Lorena Bobbit? American Snipper"
"How do you find Will Smith in a snow storm? You look for fresh prints."
"I use the phrase ""when I win the lottery"" a lot for someone who never buys any lottery tickets."
"""i would like to propose a toast"" - slice of bread"
"What do you call alien life on Europa? European. Credit to Neil Degrasse Tyson on the Late Show"
"I got arrested for punching this guy at a new year's Eve party When you hear an Arab count down from 10 your instincts kick in."