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Joke of the Day
"Pick a woman with wits. Wits will never sag."
Next Joke
"What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheel chair."
"What's the difference between my girlfriend and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when I smack it"
"What's the difference between your mother and a mosquito? The mosquito stops sucking when I slap it"
"What do we have for dinner? Wookie steak. Is it any good? Well its a little Chewy"
"Air & Sex - Joke Q: Why is air a lot like sex? A: Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any."
"HIM: If you're upset that people think you're weird, have you tried being less weird? ME: [eating ice cream with chopsticks] Yes."
"Where do space monsters live? In far distant terror-tory."
"[At Wedding] Priest: And do you take me as your lawfully wedded wife? Me: I do. WAIT A SECOND Priest: TOO LATE. YOU'RE MINE NOW, IDIOT."
"I know people say, ""Don't bring a knife to a gun fight,"" but if there's an unsliced cake at this fight, we're all going to look like idiots."