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Joke of the Day

"Just heard Barrack Obama's main writer has been killed.. Sources reporting that he is currently speechless."

"NSFW Why is driving in the snow a lot like eating pussy? Because if you're not careful you might slide into the asshole in front of you"

"Why don't hydrocarbons make good criminals? They're always getting com-busted."

"Wanted to write a funny chemistry joke... all the good ones Argon."

"The roundest Knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi."

"How come when my kid wants to show me something, she has to place it directly inside my cornea?"

"Why do Germans have such great focus? I think it's because they used to have concentration camps."

"I'm not desperate because i'm single, i'm single because i'm not desperate."

"Pedophile Kids who are scared of pedophiles really need to grow up."

"Gonna replace my friends' hand sanitizer with lube and watch them rub their hands together for an hour while it doesn't evaporate."