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Joke of the Day
"If a black dude tweets the N-word... Can I RT that? What the fuck is the protocol here?"
Next Joke
"A percussionist gets punched. What does it do? It would block."
"'Why are they arresting that dog?!? What did he do?!?' --my 6yo upon seeing a police dog sitting in the back of a police car"
"I just pissed like a horse. Not an easy stance, let me tell you."
"""What do we want?!"" ""TIME TRAVEL!"" ""When do we want it?!"" ""IRRELEVANT!"""
"Disney owns Miramax, so the gimp from ""Pulp Fiction"" is technically a Disney Princess."
"Last night my Professor told me to read Bartleby the Scrivner... I would prefer not to."
"The worst thing about kissing the person who loves you the most is when you bang your teeth off the mirror"
"Circle jerking For when you and your friends want to finish more than each other's sentences."
"What do you call the bad part of Italy? Spaghetto."