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Joke of the Day

"It's crazy how everyone sleeps differently. I sleep on my side, my roommate sleeps on his back, and my ex sleeps with everyone."

"What's the best way to break up with your girlfriend? On the front page of reddit."

"How does Moses make tea? Hewbrews it."

"What is the United States doing to fight pedophiles? Child Obesity."

"I can't remember my Password i can remember my Password being ""Mypenis"" but it keeps telling me that my password is too short :("

"[picking out a washing machine] how many watermelons can this hold? ""uhh I dunno, 11?"" only 11? *keeps walking to next one* how many waterme"

"10 years ago today, Canada received its first indoor toilet."

"What do members of secret societies use when they get a head cold? An Illumi-neti pot"

"Chivalry Is Dead They said chivalry is dead so I wanted to prove them wrong. I tried to be polite and hold the door open for a woman, but she kept screaming, ""Asshole, I'm peeing in here!"""

"I tried to download an ATV. But it was a bit Buggy."