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Joke of the Day

"If Sesame Street really cared about children they'd realize Big Bird could feed a hungry family for a month."

"""SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO SLEEP"" I yell at the neighbor I can hear vacuuming at 1pm in the afternoon."

"I just flew in from the gender neutrality conference.... And boy or girl are my arms tired"

"Me: Hello Teacher: Hello M: How's my kid doing in school? T: How's my kid doing in school? I hate parrot teacher conferences"

"What do you call a horny Egyptian king that ate at White Castle? Toot-N-Cummin!"

"A chemistry joke. Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""We don't serve noble gases in here."" Helium doesn't react."

"There's nothing sadder than a bald eagle with a combover"

"No matter how kind you are German children are kinder"

"A ship carrying red paint and a ship carrying blue paint collide in the middle of the ocean...... Both crews were marooned"

"What's scary about a white man in prison? You know he did it"