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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a chef and a gay guy? A chef doesn't stir yesterday's food."

"What's the difference between a Rottweiler and a Jewish mother? Eventually the Rottweiler lets go."

"Why are you being weird about how we made eye contact and both smiled and then I took the form of an actual bat and chased you for 11 miles"

"Speech Joke. Why shouldn't you eye-fuck someone? Because there is a chance you will get visual aids."

"What's the ultimate rejection? When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep."

"I can never tell if a mother duck is being dutifully followed by her ducklings or chased by a gang of young duck criminals."

"Always hit women with a left hook... ...because they don't deserve any rights"

"If iron man and silver surfer teamed up... They'd be alloys."

"""A cantaloupe is an antelope that doesn't."""

"What do Jesus and my high school girlfriend have in common? They both bled for me."