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Joke of the Day

"What do a Texas tornado and an Oklahoma divorce have in common? Either way someone's losing a trailer."

"What did the drowning number theorist say? logloglogloglogloglogloglogloglog"

"What I say: I'm on a diet. What my mom hears: please cook delicious food and buy chocolate."

"If I had a crystal ball that could see five years into the future... I would have 2020 vision."

"If I get hurt playing Wii Sports, that's still a sports injury, right?"

"inncocent child"

"Complained to my wife about our sex life diminishing. Zero fucks were given."

"When I asked if you'd like to go out on a date sometime, I meant with me."

"[Shark Tank] Ok hear me out. -Alright. It's an airplane made out of cats. -But why? It cant crash. Always lands on it's feet. -Please leave."

"True Story, When I was a kid, my parents would always say ""Excuse my French"" just after a swear word. I'll never forget that first day at school when my teacher asked if any of us knew any French."