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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a snobby felon falling down the stairs? A condescending condescending!"

"Q: How did the hermit pay for his home? A: Alone."

"Dead babies and rocks What is the difference between a dead baby and a rock? You can't Fuck a rock"

"DAD JOKE: Do you know where you get water from? Well..."

"the only dates i get Are the system software updates to my xbox. Play station. PC. Phone..."

"Never look down on anyone. Unless you're a lion cub named Simba and you're being held over a crowd of animals by a weird monkey doctor."

"I slept so good last night.. It was like I was on a date with Bill Cosby."

"I doubt vodka has all the answers But it's worth a shot."

"I'm not really sure I'm understanding this financial crisis in Greece... It's all Greek to me."

"A feminist asked me how I saw lesbians. Apparently *in HD* wasn't the right answer."