214955

Joke of the Day

"My father was known for running marathons He never came back from the Boston one though But I knew that he'd say it was bomb I'm glad he went out with a bang"

"A friend of mine was reading an article on a newspaper talking about the dangers of drinking, after that he stopped doing what he loved... ...reading."

"ME: Off to the concert with my friends WIFE: Say hi to everyone for me [later] ME [individually saying hi to 10,000 ppl] This is exhausting"

"Jesus wasn't a very good carpenter... I mean... He couldn't remove three nails to save his life."

"A router goes into a doctor's office and says, ""It hurts when IP."""

"Why should you bring two Mormons with you when you go fishing? Because if you only bring one, he'll drink all your beer."

"Why'd the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field."

"What shoes to chickens wear? Reebok bok bok"

"Three tampons walk into a bar, a kotex, a playtex, and a tampax. Which one says hello first? None, they're all stuck up bitches."

"Whats the difference between a wank and an egg? You can beat an egg."