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Joke of the Day

"For class, my son had to create his own mythological god. He created Chillux, the god of relaxation, whose house is full of hammocks."

Next Joke
 
"Ok, all you people who adopt dogs and put ""who rescued who?"" stickers on your car... you drive me crazy! Clearly it's ""who rescued whom?"""
"Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped on chewing gum? He got stuck in Orbit!"
"Everyone's dad turns down the radio when he misses a turn or gets lost like it was Tom Petty's fault or something."
"I snatch kisses... ...and vice versa."
"I wanted to be a pilot in the air force But they said I didn't have the right altitude."
"A man is being arrested by a female police officer she informs him, ""Anything you say can and will be held against you."" ""Anything?"" he asks with a smirk ""Anything."" ""Tits please"""
"I don't see the point of class reunions anymore now that Facebook exists."
"With Facebook, you can stay in touch with people you would otherwise never talk to, but that's only one of the many awful things about it"
"I lost my balance on an escalator and fell down the stairs for 2 hours."