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Joke of the Day

"What footwear does Hilary Clinton wear to the beach? Flip flops or scandals!"

"Whats the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick in your ass."

"It's not a matter of WHEN the world will end... ...it's WHICH Applebee's you find out at."

"speak, three languages you are trilingual, two, bi-lingual, what do they call you if you only speak one language? American"

"Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get away from the bagpipe recital."

"Q: What do you call a horse that likes arts and crafts? A: A hobby horse."

"My kids are so aware that I'm a bad driver that if I start the car before they have their seatbelts on, they cry."

"I want to put a 'Honk If You Love Jesus' bumpersticker on a goose"

"Why can't Ms. Piggy count to 70?? Because when she gets to 69 she has a Frog in her throat."

"Whoever decided on spelling ""biscuit"" really needs to get their shuit together."