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Joke of the Day

"New Band I recently started a new band: We have to play every song in a certain order and we all have to be symmetrical on stage. We're called OC/DC."

"The guy who wrote the program that estimates how much time is left on a download did not take his job seriously at all."

"Did you hear about the Mexican train robber He had Loco motives"

"[hugging mom at sister's funeral] ""And you said I'd never be your favorite"""

"[consoling grieving widow] so I guess you'll be looking for a new owner for his pokemon collection?"

"How do you say gonorrhea in Russian? Rotchurcockov."

"I wish someone would leave a horse's head in my bed so that when my kids sneak up on me in the morning, I can be like, BAM, horse's head."

"Why do black people have nightmares? One had a dream and died"

"Sorry I referred to your baby shower as a gift extortion party."

"What do you call a policewoman who shaves her pubic area? Cuntstubble!"