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Joke of the Day

"What do a woman and a condom have in common? They spend more time in your wallet than they do on your dick."

"Did you hear about the blonde who brought her cosmetics with her for a make-up exam?"

"ME: i need a loan so i can build a robot army to take over the world with BANKER: what M: oops i meant 'with which to take over the world'"

"At Christmas, it's important to pause and remember all those who have wronged you this year and how you can wreak vengeance on them in 2017"

"What would a Prius minivan be called? Post-us"

"A joke about Muhammad [removed]"

"This really crashes my belief system. Hilary Clinton spent 40 years building up her career to lose presidency to a man who picked up politics as a hobby last year."

"This guy came up to me and told me that he fucked my mom My step dad is weird as fuck"

"How many egoists does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They simply hold the bulb and wait for the world to revolve around them."

"Me: Sometimes you need to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, enfarcorate, and move on. You know what I'm saying? Friend: ..."