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Joke of the Day

"When is it time for bed at the Neverland Ranch? When the big hand touches the little hand."

"Why did the banker eat lunch by himself? Because he was a loaner."

"I cheated a guy in poker so he burnt down my house. I guess you could say it was a conflagration"

"If men knew the effect their scent has on women, they'd shower more and fart less."

"Jared Fogle gets sentenced 15 1/2 years in prison At least he'll still be able to enjoy footlongs"

"The problem with Freud... The problem with Freud is that none of his theories are testicle. Edit: testable*"

"My girlfriend reacts to 'sex night' the way a 6 year old does to 'bath night'"

"Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Whatever it is, its heading straight for the World Trade Center."

"Get AIDS from a toilet seat A patient says, Doctor, can I get AIDS from a toilet seat? The doctor replies, Yes, but only by sitting down before the last guy gets up."

"What do you get if a post office burns down? Black mail."