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Joke of the Day

"The best thing about owning a Smart Car is when it gets dirty, you can just put it in the dishwasher."

"If you're a white guy and walk into Home Depot without wearing sunglasses on top of your head, they legally don't have to sell you anything."

"How does a feminist kill a spider? Not, she is not man enough to do it."

"My grades are telling me to be a trophy wife but my looks are telling me to study harder."

"How do you reject a French girl? Just say neaux."

"*only shaves legs in the spots exposed by my ripped jeans*"

"What manner of evil contract with the devil must I enter into so I can get eye drops INTO my eyes?"

"Vine is shutting down I might actually make more in a year than a vine star does in a week."

"10 Seldom-Used Batteries that Might be Depleted... #7 will shock you!"

"What did the dick say to the condom? Cover me I'm going in."