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Joke of the Day

"A lot of women are turning into good drivers. So, if you're a good driver, watch out for turning women!"

"One day, I made instant coffee in my microwave. I nearly went back in time. - Steven Wright"

"A black man walks into a bar and robs it."

"[if my cat tweeted] When ""over 38"" is sad and missing her boyfriend, I try and cheer her up by peeing on her shoes and puking on her phone."

"Don't you hate that feeling when you close your eyes to apply shampoo, and get paranoid that someone will kill you in the shower."

"Who is Jay Gatsby's favorite superhero? Green Lantern. And his least favorite? Deadpool."

"I think my friend's new bowl is really a colander He told me a long story about how he uses it for mixing, but it doesn't hold water."

"What do you call a man in a tree with a briefcase? A branch manager."

"Professor: What is an independent variable? Student: A variable who don't need no man"

"Q: How many Chinese Red Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 10000 - to give the bulb a cultural revolution."