211896

Joke of the Day

"Your eyes are like stars. Not because they are bright and beautiful. But because they are so far apart."

"This guy's shirt said 'blink if you want me' and now my eyes are watering and I need to close them but ohmygod you guys I DO NOT WANT HIM"

"Did you hear the joke about argon and krypton? It didn't get much of a reaction. ^^^^ill^just^be^on^my^way^out^now"

"I think my gran has Alzheimer's. She called me Dave earlier when my name is Carson. Either that or she's thinking of someone else while we're having sex."

"The American Dental Association recently awarded their ""Dentist of the Year"" award once again. But all it is is a little plaque."

"What's the hardest thing about being a pedophile? Just trying to fit in, really."

"Last Christmas I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I had heart failure."

"These coffee flavored rice cakes are delicious, but chewy. [eats another coaster]"

"Motstand ar meningslost. -Bjorn Borg"

"What is ye difference between a porcupine and a porsche? The pricks are in the inside of the Porsche."