211830

Joke of the Day

"How many dead babies can you fit in a phone booth? 78.5"

"*guitarist breaks guitar* HELL YEAH *drummer throws drums* YES YES *singer stabs a bunch of guys* OH MY GOD *bassist plants a bomb* STOP"

"I've always wanted to be a comedian... But I have a tremendous fear of being laughed at."

"Been reading up on the thesaurus lately because a mind is a terrible thing to garbage."

"What do cows read at the breakfast table? The moospaper!"

"What did Obe Wan say to Skywalker when he was teaching him table manners? Use the forks Luke."

"Why are chefs the meanest? Because they beat the eggs and whip the cream"

"The music teacher at the school my niece goes to was out sick 2 days last week. The school had a dog fill in for her. He was a sub woofer."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper? He sold his soul to Santa"

"What is the difference between a Windows Phone and a brick? One is a brick and the other is a brick with a screen"