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Joke of the Day

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Not sure but I ran over the fucker in my Toyota Yaris."

"I hate when you compliment on their mustache... ..and suddenly she's not your friend anymore."

"I quit my job and handed in my badge and gun to my boss, he said, why do you have a gun? You work at McDonald's."

"I never buy Velcro It's such a rip off."

"love is like a fart If you have to to force it, it's probably shit."

"Mrs. Bigger liked telling everyone her newborn baby boy was a lot bigger than she was... But he was really just a little Bigger."

"I choose which country to root for in the Olympics by what cuisine I'm hungry for at the moment. Go Italy! #gnocchi2014"

"What is the worst part about being told you have Alzheimer's? It never happens just once."

"What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? The bench can support a family."

"Why do ballerinas stand on their toes? Can't they just get taller women?"