211322
Joke of the Day
"Two snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff... BA DUM PSSHHH"
Next Joke
"It's impossible to be a parent and stay on twitter so I'm afraid it's time to say goodbye. So this is your uncle, you live with him now."
"Q: How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None, that's a hardware problem."
"I keep confusing 9-11 and 7-11. Gotta stop going to ground zero for Nerds Rope."
"I finally decided on my Halloween costume. I'm going to go as a French pancake chef; that'll really give people the crepes."
"Muffins - for people who don't have the guts to order cake for breakfast."
"Holocaust jokes are not funny Anne Frankly sick of them."
"Me: Jesus. Get the kids inside Wife: What's wron- Me: *running* JUST GET THE DAMN KIDS INSIDE [a bee flies off of the lens of my binoculars]"
"What's the difference between oooh and ahh? 3 inches"
"Friends that are with you during your darkest times probably didn't pay their electric bill either."