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Joke of the Day
"What did the pirate captain say to the sucker fish he hired to clean his ship? Suck my *DECK*!!!"
Next Joke
"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my cock in your ass."
"Why are men better cooks? They only need 2 eggs n 1 sausage to keep a girl full for 9 months"
"Whats an African-American's favorite fare? Welfare."
"Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay! You have my word!"
"It Looks Like a Booger But it's SNOT!"
"""I made $200.05 giving BJ's to people yesterday."" ""Who gave you a nickel?"" ""Everyone did."""
"""Whats your biggest weakness?"" ""I'm bad at taking compliments"" ""Actually that's quite endearing"" *Leaps across table, punches him in throat*"
"Me: Why am I suddenly sick? Friend: Probably the change in the Weather [earlier] Weather: *uncharacteristically puts poison in my coffee*"
"My husband doesn't like it when I say we are ""married"" with quotation marks."