210971

Joke of the Day

"Nephews joke... What do you call a witch that goes to the beach? Sandwich(sandwitch) -my nephew"

"What's the difference between my wife and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist."

"Why can the Devil never go back to Georgia? He fiddled up a little kid."

"How many black people does it to pave a driveway? One. You just have to spread him real thin."

"How many millennials does it take to screw in a light bulb? 100. 1 to do it, and 99 to stand around saying the old one was better."

"If you stand by and watch someone wreck their life, you're part of the problem And yet we all still go to weddings for the open bar"

"My phone just autocorrected ""doofus"" to ""doodie""...and I thought *I* was immature."

"Why was the snowman smiling? ...he saw a snowblower coming up the street."

"People change. Except for that homeless guy down the street. Pretty sure he's had the same clothes on since the 90's."

"My ex just asked if I want to go on holiday with him and my ex mother-in-law and now I don't need Twitter because I will never stop laughing"