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Joke of the Day

"Top causes of divorce: 1. Finances 2. Infidelity 3. Unmet expectations 4. Growing apart 5. Tandem bikes"

"I survived Sharknado, but my friends didn't... ... I miss those chums"

"Told my pregnant boss this: Is it OK for you to drink while pregnant... if you're gonna give the baby up for adoption? She laughed at least. But I no longer work there"

"My First reddit Joke: Why did the walrus go to the Tupperware store? Because he was looking for a tight seal!"

"Why did the semen cross the road? Because I put the wrong socks on this morning"

"Crack-head's favorite rap song... I wanna rock RIGHT NOW!!!!"

"Why are DJ's called 'radio personalities' ? Because if they had the looks they'd be on TV."

"This self checkout lane has the sexiest cashier."

"Glue Sticks... I was walking through an arts and crafts shop when I saw a sign saying, ""Glue Sticks.""I thought, ""No shit."""

"I stay away from granny Smith. She's just too tart for me."