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Joke of the Day

"I hate being Bipolar... It's awesome."

"What do broccoli and anal sex have in common? If you didn't like it as a kid, you probably don't like it as an adult."

"How many Californians does it take to change a lightbulb? Hella. How long does it take them? Days."

"Do you know how many hydrogen bonds I can disrupt? (Chemistry pick-up line) Enough to break the ice, how's it going?"

"Teacher: Fill out the parent form. Me: Why? Teacher: So I can contact you if your kid gets in trouble. Me: *writing* Raised. By. Wolves."

"At the library: Librarian: you have 45 cents in late fees. Me: (adjusts bow tie then slides 50 cents across the table) Keep the change"

"""This love triangle is WAY too complicated"" Pythagoras' other woman"

"Why did King Arthur leave no heir? He was legendary for pulling out."

"Why don't black people ever go on cruises? We're not falling for that one again!"

"Voat's servers"