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Joke of the Day

"They say if you love something set it free... but I don't really love the hookers in my basement."

"I named my penis ""Che Guevara""... ... because he strikes fast and retracts even faster. ^^^Also ^^^he ^^^has ^^^a ^^^funny ^^^beard."

"It's okay Pluto I am not a planet either."

"If I don't make some serious changes to my life, they'll never let me into the gates of heaven. So who can teach me how to pick a lock?"

"Why do blondes have see-through lunch box tops? So they can tell if they are going to work or going home while on the bus."

"A poem for you I dig... You dig... We dig... He dig... She dig... They dig... ******** It's not a very beautiful poem but it's quite deep"

"I just read on the news that 10 Paralympics athletes have failed a drugs test They all tested positive for WD40"

"[aquarium] Me: ""That's a lot of octopussies to occupy a tank."" Guide: ""it's octopi."" Me: ""Oh..that's a lot of octopussies to octopi a tank."""

"What's the difference between broccoli and cat poop? My dog won't eat broccoli."

"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? pick it up and suck his dick"