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Joke of the Day
"I don't want to seem desperate, so I always wait at least 3 days before I call 911."
Next Joke
"What if they make a movie about Leo's life and how he couldn't win an Oscar, and the dude who plays Leo wins an Oscar...AWKWARD!"
"I can't remember this joke. This joke had a sadist, masochis, murderer, rapist, and some other guys all talking about what they were going to do to a cat. Does anyone know what I'm talking about?"
"My girlfriend treats me like I'm God She ignores my existence and doesn't ever speak to me."
"It takes more muscles to frown than to smile. Wouldn't that make frowning an exercise? You lazy bastards."
"The Miss Universe pageant is fixed. All the winners are from Earth."
"Subway is like prostitution you pay someone else to do your wife's job."
"The car you buy should say something about you, and not just ramble on about itself like you're not even there."
"So a dyslexic guy walks into a bra."
"Trump for president! There will be hell toupee"