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Joke of the Day
"Why do the English always carry umbrellas? Because umbrellas can't walk"
Next Joke
"Wish I had a neck like an owl so when a guy is spooning me right after sex I could turn my head all the way around and say that was awful"
"TRUE STORY Just made this restaurant change its ""All you can drink Brunch"" Policy."
"Give a retarded man a fish... And he'll plant it and try to grow a fish tree."
"Here's what I've been thinking... How can a male have nut allergies?"
"So my drug dealer got me these new shoes.. And I don't know what he laced them with.. But I've been tripping all day"
"If alcohol kills germs and laughter is the best medicine, I'm the healthiest mofo on this planet."
"I need your parent's phone number so I can call you & hang up when they answer. Cause if I'm gonna crush on you, I'm doing it old school."
"How can you tell who the head doctor is? They're the one with the dirtiest knees"
"Why don't kleptomaniacs get puns? Because they always take things literally."