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Joke of the Day

"Too ugly for the people I want. Too hot for the people who want me."

"If I ever go to prison, I'm gonna make damn sure everyone knows my street name: Butthole Teeth."

"I like dating black girls Because I don't have to meet their dads"

"If it weren't for double standards, some people would have no standards at all."

"What is the difference between a woman on her period and a terrorist? You can negotiate with terrorists"

"Who is always your friend at school? Your princi-pal."

"I just yawned on the bus and two dudes gave me their phone numbers."

"Try talking to a dog without asking it a question. Go ahead, I dare you"

"My mom just took away my mood ring. I don't know how I feel about it."

"The average person has sex 103 times a year and it's almost March so that means only 103 more to go."