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Joke of the Day

"A parrot named Nigel leaves home and returns home,4 years later, speaking Spanish It's pretty common, all the language majors I knew moved back in with their parents too."

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"before x-rays doctors had to climb inside people and draw a picture of their bones. some still do"
"What do you call a blind German? A nazi."
"A dyslexic man walks into a bra"
"A man took an airline to court because his luggage was stolen. Unfortunately, he lost his case."
"Why do Indians hate snow? Because it's white and settles on their land. Edit: well now I know what people mean by rip inbox. Edit2: wtf happened to my headline, why is it Donald trump?"
"Did you hear Lance Armstrong lied The ball of some people"
"Cop: You were speeding so I'm going to be giving you a ticket Me: Ooh, could I win something Cop: Sort of, 2 more of these & you get a bike"
"What do you call an older man who goes after young boys? Nittany Lions"
"I'd like rap a lot better if they sang, played instruments, had talent, and didn't rap."