208682

Joke of the Day

"[At job interview] Interviewer: So tell me why you want this job. Me: I have no money and I prefer when I have money."

"*feels painful possible cavity* *eats chocolate to feel better*"

"What do Jewish pedophiles say to kids? Hey, wanna buy some candy?"

"What's a metaphor? Winning the game tournament!"

"Heard of The Gay Martini? they're pretty strong. You drink just one and you can't see straight."

"When asked why he wouldn't upgrade his operating system to Windows 8... Arnold Schwarzenegger replied: 'Windows 8, never! I still love Vista baby'..."

"If you give me a hard time about being out of shape I will bury you in a shallow grave. A very, very, shallow grave"

"Knuckle tattoo idea: BORN DEFORMED"

"A dop Ted Father : Son, do we have any dop ted? Son : What's a dop ted? Father : You are. You're adopted. Son : Nice one dad. Father : I'm not your dad."

"What does r/jokes have in common with Amy Schumer Most of these joke aren't original."