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Joke of the Day

"I watched a porn where the guy had a thing for older women. It was a coming of age story."

"Did you know? Accordion to a recent study, 90% of the world don't realise when a word has been swapped with an instrument."

"Did you hear about the guy that was half Black and half Japanese ... ... every December 7th he would attack Pearl Bailey."

"Why doesn't Mr.Sodium like to spend time with Mr.H20? Because they always get in to heated arguments."

"I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the Internet was a thing I asked my 17 brothers and sisters, and they didn't know either"

"a good dentist and a bad dentist finds out about a new candy store opening good dentist: oh man, i hope the people who go there brush and floss regularly bad dentist: ALRIGHT!!! job security!"

"I saw a fat lady accidentally sit on a phone today I guess you could call that a booty call..."

"Your girlfriend is 41?!?! she could be your mother! but she isn't... She's yours."

"When I quit my job I'm going to barge into my boss's office, slam my gun and badge on his desk, and storm out of this Arby's forever."

"scarlet joe hanson sounds like an old timey boxer's name. ""weighin' in at 182 lbs, 5'9"", the ol' black widow, scarlet jooooooe hansen!"""