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Joke of the Day

"It's too tight Girl: It's too tight! Boy: Don't worry, I'll do it slowly Girl: Push it in! Boy: Ah, I can't... Girl: It's painful... Boy: Forget it. I'll just buy a new wedding ring"

"What can a goose do that a duck can't do and a lawyer should do? Stick his bill up his ass."

"A time traveler walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""We don't serve time travelers in here."" A time traveler walks into a bar."

"I went the school of hard knocks... My knuckles are still sore."

"What did a cell say to his sister cell, when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!"

"Spoiler: Ramsay Bolton wouldn't be a good employer... Because he killed Osha."

"Why do Iraqi police officers walk in threes? The first knows how to read the second knows how to write and the third is to keep an eye on the two intellectuals."

"How many people who subscribed to r/The_Donald does it take to screw in a light bulb? Obviously more than one because it's still dark in their mother's basement."

"Captain America: WHERE ARE YOU WE NEED YOU Black WINDOW: FOR THE LAST TIME YOU GOT THE WRONG NUMBER"

"I should run for public office just to see the scandalous dirt they dig up on me. I would really like to piece together my twenties."