208273
Joke of the Day
"Life is like a box of chocolates.... It doesn't last too long for fat people."
Next Joke
"Stuffs sugar packets into my handbag as I leave the cafe. Sachets away."
"A woman goes to up to a bar and orders a Double Entrendre... So the barman gave her one."
"I was trying to recall what size shirt to get my friend the psychic, then I remembered.....medium, of course."
"Okay kids don't ever talk to strangers or take candy from strangers or go to stranger's houses except on the day we worship the devil."
"How can you tell when a politician is lying? When their lips move"
"Some parents count to 10 to get their kids to behave. I use a similar technique where I string out crime scene tape and fire up a chainsaw."
"I tell you what makes my blood boil, faulty spacesuits."
"Why would you never starve in the desert? Because of all the sandwiches there."
"What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef"